I figured I would drop in since it’s been so long. I hadn’t realized all of the emails and comments I had received. I am humbly grateful for all of the readers who have shared their stories and thoughts, and I’m sorry I am so late to return. I figured I would shut this down for good, but I think I would rather just keep it up and just keep writing, don’t stop. I need this. I needed it then for much different reasons, but when I found myself signing up to start a whole new blog, I had to ask myself why.
You see, I might be over the divorce but life goes on! I still have relevant (at least I hope) topics to discuss and things on my mind that I need to get out of my head. You can probably guess that I wouldn’t be here right now if my life right now was sunshine and rainbows, and I was out there just living it up. You would be correct. I’m stuck in one of those “transitional” phases again. These happen pretty often. I can’t help but wonder if genes have something to do with it, my parents astrological signs, or the fact that they were always so different, and I have all of those “differences” in me, all in one person. This makes for a confusing and frustrating sense of being sometimes.
A few years ago, I was on “the path” and I was certain to achieve great personal success (by my own measure) I planned to continue my education, upgrade my digs and live happily ever after. Now, I am not quite sure what will come of the next few years. I am most certain that I will not go on for more schooling (Feds are going to kill us on these interest rates anyway) the mortgage rates are on the rise, job creation is not as great as we hoped for, and people are still struggling. Its a different world now than the one I was in when I had made my plans.
Now, I would feel more about my future by working at a gas station and hiding money in my mattress than I would about becoming a lawyer. (who can afford to sue anymore anyway!)
So, decisions will need to be made. Career decisions, personal life decisions, tough. decisions. I was never the feminist type who believed in the proverbial “glass ceiling” but guess what? I have a bump on my head from slamming right into it. You know, something funny happened on the way up the corporate ladder, I learned my ”place” and not that I am in any way complaining about my company, in fact they are truly great to work for, but they just won’t utilize me to my ability. The last straw of my patience came yesterday morning when one of the lower level execs (for the fifth time) came into my office and asked me to “look something up” for him, print out the info, and give it back. He does this a lot with this particular website, a website that is open to the public, does not require a sign on, and takes less than a minute to navigate. Well, considering that, it doesn’t seem like he asked for anything too bad right? Well, the question begins to develop: how much time did you spend writing down the information you need me to “look up” then coming into my office to ask me to do it? He easily would have completed the task in his own time.
I am certainly not the first one to imply that this man has “issues” working with women (and not all of these people have been women either) So, luckily enough for me, I have an awesome boss who knows the situation, so I vented to him, I said, look it’s fine: printing his envelopes and playing secretary or whatever it is he has me doing; but if he tells me to make him a sandwich, I’m suing. He high fived me. Welcome to the boys club…
